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Danni Segal,
Sleep-deprived
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The (ir)regular thoughts of Around-Bexhill.co.uk
founder, Danni Segal, on life in Bexhill-on-Sea
This column reflects the thoughts of Danni Segal, and does not
claim to reflect the opinions of around-bexhill.co.uk or any of
the shops or businesses listed on this site unless directly stated
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Dateline: October 2006
Item: Bexhill 2027
I’d like to start with a quote, taken from a review of the film Children Of Men written by Damon Wise for the current issue (#209, November 2006) of Empire magazine:
“Britain in 2027 is, it seems, backward even by ’70s standards, a military regime where public transport is rundown and battered, immigrants are arrested on the streets, and the whole city of Bexhill has become a lawless internment camp for the dispossessed.”
I’ll leave you to make up your own jokes.
Note: the full review of this film can be found here.
Item: A Load Of Old Balls
Joni Mitchell, in the lyrics of the song Big Yellow Taxi, wrote that:
If that were to be re-written about Bexhill, the lyrics would have to go:
 I refer, off course, to the area outside the Post Office in Bexhill town center. An area which used to offer valuable car parking spaces but was turned into a piazza, a word defined in Wikipedia as “a paved open pedestrian space, without grass or planting”. Basically, a large slab of concrete with no purpose other then to take up space. And surely far more useful then, for example, a number of disabled parking spaces that would directly benefit members of the community.
The change was made, and I quote directly here from the Rother District Council web site, to make the town centre “safer and more accessible for pedestrians, as well as a pleasurable place for people to enjoy whether they be residents or visitors”. Personally I am not sure how a large slab of concrete makes the place more pleasurable, unless your idea of pleasure is to stand outside a Post Office for hours on end.
But maybe I am being a bit harsh here. After all, a large open space is surely of use to the community. Maybe it could be used as an outdoor cafe during the Summer months to allow residents and visitors to enjoy a cup of tea in the sunshine? Or maybe to allow individuals to run craft stalls offering their homemade goods without the need to take out a 6-month lease on a shop? Or, at a push, a few benches to allow those who have been out shopping to enjoy a sit down and catch up with old friends. Sound like a reasonable idea? Well, the simple fact of the matter is that these simple ideas will not happen.
Again according to the Rother District Council web site, “Consents would normally only be granted to traders if they are approved by the organizer of an event that is of an educational, cultural nature or that promotes Bexhill” and “the event should be organised by a professional group that does not only operate for pecuniary profit”. This means that a street cafe or market stalls, which would exist to earn money for the people who run them, are not an option. As for having benches, I again quote, “If a person, without lawful authority or excuse, in any way wilfully obstructs the free passage along a highway he is guilty of an offence” - basically, putting down any kind of seating would break the law.
 So we are left with a large open area of concrete, defined only by the concrete balls on its edges that are there not for artistic reasons, but simply to stop people parking on it.
So what can be done? One solution suggested to me was that the council should paint the concrete balls a range of different colours, and then paint a snooker player on the ground. As I do not advocate vandalism, I have put together an artist’s impression of what that might look like and, quite frankly, I can’t help but feel that it is something of an improvement.
Until next time,
Danni Segal
founder
around-bexhill.co.uk
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